Friday, May 27, 2011

May 27, 2011

Happy birthday to me! I'm 53 today.

I have to say, my life is pretty good. I have a wonderful husband, superior sisters, my parents are both stil with me and active, terrific nieces and a great nephew, and a few really special friends. I am unique in my approach to life and "live large."

There are two things that I would like to change -- my weight and my job. Both have been weighing on my mind. I will address both in the coming year and both situations will improve.

As far as my diet is concerned, since my mouth has healed from my surgery, I am getting back to the Master Cleanse fast. I took off my armband because the rash and bruise have been really bothering me. I'll check back into the blog in a week to let you know how the cleanse is going.

Have a great day!!

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Thursday, May 26, 2011

Yesterday was quite day! Work was, well, work. Boring and stressful, how is that possible??!! After work, I had a second phone interview for a much-desired job. The interview was very hard. Difficult questions, tricky follow-ups ... it was hard to make sure I was answering the questions with what they were looking for. Following the interview I went to dinner with my mom and siters to celebrate my birthday. We went to a Chinese restaurant where I managed to get out alive. (I didn't do too badly.) From there, I ran home and got Michael so we could go see my niece in her final orchestra performance.

I didn't meet any of my goals yesterday.

BodyMedia FIT data for May 25, 2011
Calories Burned - 2441 | Calories Consumed - 2283 | Total Activity - 0:34 | Moderate Activity - 0:34 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 7092 | Sleep Duration - 5:29 | Lying Down - 8:03 | Sleep Efficiency - 68%.

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

May 25, 2011

Good steps-- met goal. Good activity -- met goal. Too much eating -- did not meet goal. My deficit was 460, though.

I did make an effort yesterday. Well, let's put it like this, I tried not to eat a whole lot. As always, it's easy for me to get my exercise in. I like to exercise. What's hard for me is not eating ...

I have way more going on today than I like. Even though it's all good stuff, I don't really enjoy days where I have to tear around from one thing to the next. It's not how I'm put together.

My day looks like this: Work, rush home for a phone interview, rush to my birthday dinner with my mom and sisters, rush to my niece's concert. Like I said, it's all good stuff, but it's too much rushing for my tastes.

Anyway, wish me luck for the phone interview! I think I'd really like the job

BodyMedia FIT data for May 24, 2011
Calories Burned - 2614 | Calories Consumed - 2154 | Total Activity - 1:11 | Moderate Activity - 1:11 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 10009 | Sleep Duration - 7:21 | Lying Down - 10:08 | Sleep Efficiency - 73%.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

I made two of my three goals! I had more than 8,000 steps and more than 30 minutes of moderate activity. Good job,me! :)

I ate too much. Part of the problem was that Moday is my day off and I was at home. I did some cooking and that ended up getting me in trouble. Still, my deficit was 415.

My sleep numbers aren't accurate. Since I did have the band on the night before, there were no numbers to report.

Today, I will try to really watch my consumption and will get some good steps in.

I hope that you have a great day!

BodyMedia FIT data for May 23, 2011
Calories Burned - 2836 | Calories Consumed - 2421 | Total Activity - 1:09 | Moderate Activity - 1:09 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 11234 | Sleep Duration - 0:00 | Lying Down - 0:00 | Sleep Efficiency - 0%.

Monday, May 23, 2011

Monday, May 23,2011

I got weighed and reset my goals this morning. I charged my armband and put it back on. (I still have the seemingly permanent bruise/ring around my arm.)

I set a goal of 1 pound a week, which means I'll reach goal on June 25, 2012. To do that, I have to burn 2250 calories each day, and consume less than 1750. That seems reasonable. My moderate activity would have to be 30 minutes, and my steps would have to be 8000. Again, that all seems reasonable.

Hard thing is, I'm not a reasonable, normal person when it comes to food.

I am trying to keep in mind one of most basic philosophies. Ths philosophy can be summed up in one of many quotes, including:

"Live the life you aspire to."

"Live like you've already arrived."

"Act as if."

"Fake it until you make it."

"Eat like thin people do."

It's all basically the same idea.

Habits, habits, habits.

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Nope, I haven't posted since Thurdsday morning.

Why? You ask.

Well, because I haven't wanted to.

Why? You ask.

Well, because, I haven't been trying at all and my calorie consumption is out-of-hand.

Thursday = 2641
Friday = 2795
Saturday = 2641

I exercised Friday, but not Thursday or Saturday.

What's going on?

Honestly, I'm sick of trying. I took off my armband.

Why? You ask.

Well, for three reasons: 1) I have a rash, bruise and seemingly permanent indentation on my arm. 2) I am sick of people seeing it with the short sleeved shirts I've been wearing and asking "What's that for? Really? How's it going?" 3) It seems pointless since I'm not trying to control my intake lately.

There you have it.

Am I mad? Yes.

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Let's sum it up like this ... Cracker Jacks have waaaaaaaay more calories than you'd think! I basically ruined a good exercise day with a Cracker Jacks splurge.

Let's look at the positive. I had a great workout. I ate plenty of fruits and vegetables. I ate whole grain. I recorded everything.

BodyMedia FIT data for May 18, 2011
Calories Burned - 2533 | Calories Consumed - 2611 | Total Activity - 0:50 | Moderate Activity - 0:50 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 8407 | Sleep Duration - 5:51 | Lying Down - 7:28 | Sleep Efficiency - 78%.

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

Yesterday was the best day I've had in a while! I ate lots of fruits and vegetables, only whole grain, and kept the fat low.

I wasn't able to get to the gym after work because I had a busy evening. I came right home from work and applied for a job that my sister told me about. It's a hot prospect and I didn't want to miss it. After I finished the application, I headed to my nieces' final school concert.

At the concert, I ran into a an old friend from high school. It's been 30+ years since I've seen him. It was an unepxected treat. Still, I couldn't help but get nagging "fat feelings." I wish I wasn't fat ... If wishes were horses ..

BodyMedia FIT data for May 17, 2011
Calories Burned - 2393 | Calories Consumed - 1891 | Total Activity - 0:34 | Moderate Activity - 0:34 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 5824 | Sleep Duration - 6:43 | Lying Down - 7:21 | Sleep Efficiency - 91%.

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

I am not doing well at all. I have been overeating and not exercising very hard. I have had overages. I am not focused. I've lost my motivation. I have thought about quitting. My weight is up.

I'm not sure what happened. I'm not sure what to do. I feel like I need a "trick," but there are no more rabbits in my hat, no more scarves up my sleeve, no aces in the hole ...

BodyMedia FIT data for May 16, 2011
Calories Burned - 2455 | Calories Consumed - 2882 | Total Activity - 0:45 | Moderate Activity - 0:45 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 6562 | Sleep Duration - 8:24 | Lying Down - 9:04 | Sleep Efficiency - 93%

Monday, May 16, 2011

Long Time No See!

Yes, I am still alive!  I am maintaining right now and getting ready to go back into losing mode.  Diana, you are so awesome!  I am so thankful that you continue to post here everyday!  You help to keep me motivated.  Wanta do a one week challenge?  I can't seem to go beyond that these days.  Perhaps 2 weeks.  A comittment longer than that is probably not going to happen.  LOL
- Tracy

Monday, May 16, 2011

The data from yesterday was lost and isn't available.

I didn't have a very good day. I had some popcorn and a few cookies during the afternoon and soft tacos for dinner. I wouldn't say it was a terrible day, just not very good.

I plan on a better day today!

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Sunday, May 15, 2011

BodyMedia FIT data for May 14, 2011
Calories Burned - 2482 | Calories Consumed - 1961 | Total Activity - 0:50 | Moderate Activity - 0:50 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 8106 | Sleep Duration - 7:19 | Lying Down - 8:18 | Sleep Efficiency - 88%.

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Saturday, May 13, 2011

Surplus! Bo!! Hiss!!

BodyMedia FIT data for May 13, 2011
Calories Burned - 2532 | Calories Consumed - 2609 | Total Activity - 0:48 | Moderate Activity - 0:48 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 8258 | Sleep Duration - 6:32 | Lying Down - 7:11 | Sleep Efficiency - 91%.

Friday, May 13, 2011

Friday, May 13, 2011

Late to post today since the blog site was down this morning.

Today isn't looking any better than yesterday. Looking like two bad days in a row! :(

BodyMedia FIT data for May 12, 2011
Calories Burned - 2387 | Calories Consumed - 2366 | Total Activity - 0:23 | Moderate Activity - 0:23 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 6513 | Sleep Duration - 4:18 | Lying Down - 7:19 | Sleep Efficiency - 59%.

Thursday, May 12, 2011

Thursday, May 12, 2011

I'm feeling tired this morning. My armband reports that I only slept 4 hours and 18 minutes. When I am something on my mind, I toss and turn. Last night I was thinking about my job search.

I would really like to find another position. With the job market so tight, I realize that it might take a long time. I'm happy that I'm looking. I think it shows that I'm feeling more confident lately. Even if I don't find something suitable, at least I'm trying!

Yesterday's gym visit saved me. I'm showing a deficit and some good steps and activity level.

Today, I think I'll take Opal for a walk after work instead of going to the gym.

Have a great day!

BodyMedia FIT data for May 11, 2011
Calories Burned - 2513 | Calories Consumed - 2127 | Total Activity - 0:46 | Moderate Activity - 0:46 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 8345 | Sleep Duration - 6:18 | Lying Down - 7:29 | Sleep Efficiency - 84%.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Almost forgot to post this morning! I got caught up my in my job search and was looking around on various companies web sites.

I had a good day yesterday, both at the gym and with my food choices. My deficit was 695.

I tried to go back to the Master Cleanse fast on Monday, but my mouth still isn't healed enough. The acid and the red pepper irritated the graft sites and made me reconsider. I guess it's just too soon. I will try again after I visit the oral surgeon.

I've packed a healthy lunch for the day and plan to go to the gym after work.


BodyMedia FIT data for May 10, 2011
Calories Burned - 2641 | Calories Consumed - 1946 | Total Activity - 0:54 | Moderate Activity - 0:54 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 8640 | Sleep Duration - 6:53 | Lying Down - 8:46 | Sleep Efficiency - 79%.

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Tuesday, May 11, 2011

Check out these numbers!

My deficit was a whopping 2,034!!

Lookin' for another great day today! Hopes yours is wonderful, too!

BodyMedia FIT data for May 9, 2011
Calories Burned - 3062 | Calories Consumed - 1028 | Total Activity - 1:10 | Moderate Activity - 1:10 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 13584 | Sleep Duration - 6:30 | Lying Down - 7:51 | Sleep Efficiency - 83%.

Monday, May 9, 2011

May 9, 2011 (Part Two)

There's a new picture of me on the "Diana Progress" page!

Monday, May 9, 2011

BodyMedia FIT data for May 8, 2011
Calories Burned - 2679 | Calories Consumed - 2466 | Total Activity - 1:04 | Moderate Activity - 1:04 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 11788 | Sleep Duration - 7:40 | Lying Down - 9:04 | Sleep Efficiency - 85%.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Sunday, May 8 2011

Happy Mothers' Day!!

I'm taking my wonderful mother out to lunch today at Olive Garden. I'll be good!!

My mouth seems to be healing up nicely. I'm still not allowed to bite into things directly,but it doesn't hurt anymore.

I had some good steps and a good activity level yesterday. When the sun comes up, I think I'll take Opal for a walk. I sure do love getting outside to get in my steps.

Next week looks pretty open for getting to gym. I think that tomorrow I'll go with Michael when he gets off work have a nice long workout followed by a sauna and steam. We haven't done that in a while and I always enjoy it.

Have a great day!

BodyMedia FIT data for May 7, 2011
Calories Burned - 2564 | Calories Consumed - 2224 | Total Activity - 0:55 | Moderate Activity - 0:55 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 8525 | Sleep Duration - 7:04 | Lying Down - 8:40 | Sleep Efficiency - 82%.

Saturday, May 7, 2011

Saturday, May 7, 2011

What an odd set of numbers from yesterday! Sleep the night before was 3 hours and 26minutes. Despite that, I had great a activity level and great steps! I just sorta slogged through the day, forcing myself to work and walk.

I feel better today. I got a some decent sleep last night and I've packed some healthy food for the day.

I hope that your day goes well!

BodyMedia FIT data for May 6, 2011
Calories Burned - 2833 | Calories Consumed - 2331 | Total Activity - 1:37 | Moderate Activity - 1:37 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 13393 | Sleep Duration - 3:26 | Lying Down - 6:25 | Sleep Efficiency - 54%.

Friday, May 6, 2011

Friday, May 6, 2011

Bad day at the feed bag!! I just ate too much, starting with a chocolate doughnut and finishing with a generous portion of hamburger helper.

I guess I was feeling stressed yesterday. I had an interview right after work, so my work time felt preoccupied and anxious. The interview wasn't the best I've ever had. I just didn't feel much of a connection. The stress of the day led to overeating.

I expect today to be difficult. We are having a party at work. There will be cake, pizza and other goodies. If it's not raining when I get home, I may take Opal for a walk. Michael has plans after work, so he won't be going to the gym. I may skip the gym and get some steps with my favorite walking buddy!

I had a TERRIBLE night's sleep last night. (The number you see below are from two nights ago. Calories and activity are always the day prior and sleep from two night prior.) I only slept 3 hours and 26 minutes last night. I feel exhausted and irritable this morning.

BodyMedia FIT data for May 5, 2011
Calories Burned - 2437 | Calories Consumed - 2391 | Total Activity - 0:43 | Moderate Activity - 0:43 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 7467 | Sleep Duration - 5:56 | Lying Down - 6:35 | Sleep Efficiency - 90%.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

Thursday, May 5, 2011

A bit rushed this morning!!

BodyMedia FIT data for May 4, 2011
Calories Burned - 2643 | Calories Consumed - 2255 | Total Activity - 1:04 | Moderate Activity - 1:04 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 10547 | Sleep Duration - 6:57 | Lying Down - 7:34 | Sleep Efficiency - 92%.

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Back to work today after 5 days off. My mouth is still healing but it doesn't hurt as badly. I still am not allowed to bite into anything directly and can't have anything acidy or spicy.

I am going to give the Master Cleanse Fast another shot in a week. During the 5 days that I stuck to it, I lost 13 pounds. I gained 7 of it back almost immediately, but the 5 pound loss has stuck for more than 10 days. A pound day is pretty good!

Today my weight is steady at 235. Yesterday was pretty good. I controlled my intake and enjoyed a big bowl of carrots and parsnips when I got hungry in the afternoon.

I'm packing healthy lunch and am planning to go to the gym after work. I haven't been able to go since the doctor didn't want my elevated heart rate to cause more bleeding. It'll be good to get some steps logged.

Have a great day! TTYL!!

BodyMedia FIT data for May 3, 2011
Calories Burned - 2593 | Calories Consumed - 1992 | Total Activity - 0:20 | Moderate Activity - 0:20 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 8137 | Sleep Duration - 6:15 | Lying Down - 8:42 | Sleep Efficiency - 72%.

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

Tuesday May 3, 2011 -- Part Two

As you probably gleaned from my post yesterday, a lot of the impetus behind the beginning of my journey had to do with me hating the way I looked. I literally stopped caring about my appearance and allowed myself to accept it.

I've been thinking a lot about what I wrote yesterday, about the interview I went on, and about my image. I've never been one to fuss over myself, wear lots of make-up, fiddle with my hair, or wear lots of jewelry/accessories. Still, I did care what I looked like and I did make an effort to be attractive.

I LOVED getting dressed up yesterday; it felt great to "show myself off." Even at 235 pounds, I felt confident and capable. I felt so good that I took a self-portrait and posted it on facebook. This was a big step for me; people that haven't seen me in years were able to see that I wasn't slim, athletic and sexy anymore. Making an effort to look nice made a huge difference in my attitude and made for a wonderful day. It also made me stop and think how much better I would look and feel about myself if I made more of an effort on a daily basis.

I believe that by making an effort to present myself more professionally, more attractively, and just prettier, I might be inspired to make a bigger push to lose more weight.

Don't get me wrong, 25 pounds lost in 7 months is an accomplishment. I'm proud of what I've done, but I have been struggling for months to maintain a consistent effort. Maybe if I dressed like someone who cares about her image, I would slowly really start to care. You know, really care about how I looked. Really care about the whole me. Maybe I would naturally make good choices.

This rambling makes some sense to me, does it make sense to you?

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

BodyMedia FIT data for May 2, 2011
Calories Burned - 2379 | Calories Consumed - 2212 | Total Activity - 0:19 | Moderate Activity - 0:19 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 6400 | Sleep Duration - 7:33 | Lying Down - 9:53 | Sleep Efficiency - 76%.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Monday, May 2, 2011

Yesterday was a typical day for me -- good steps, reasonable activity level, poor sleep, and too much food.

Patterns, patterns, patterns ...

Today I have an interview for a different position. I'm excited about the possibility of a different job, but nervous about the interview. I feel prepared. My resume looks good, I think my cover letter is good, and my new suit is nice. I should do fine.

A new job might be just what I need. Something more in the public eye might help me in regard to my body image. Maybe if more people saw me on a daily basis, I would become more motivated to look better. I know that I "shouldn't" be motivated by what people think about how my body looks, but honestly, I am. It matters to me what people think.

In September 2010, I was really struggling with my body image. I hated the way I looked. I avoided going anywhere, and made up excuses to not go out. It got so bad that I started worrying about myself. We went camping in September, I spent one day crying and telling Michael about how I felt. He suggested that I go talk to a therapist. I did.

The therapist suggested that I allow some pictures of myself to be posted on facebook. He felt the first step was acknowledging my present self and to stop hiding. So, at my in-laws 50th wedding anniversay party, I had some pictures taken and used those. I weighed 260. In October, I bought the BodyMedia armband and started using it. Sometime after that, Tracy started this blog and I started posting.

I was still working at home and still barely left the house. Going out was big deal. I didn't have any clothes to wear, and I felt awful about the way I looked. I wore sweats and jammies most of the time. I started walking and cutting back. I started losing weight.

In February, I decided to give up working at home and went to the call center. It was a big change for me. I'd been at home for 1 1/2 years. Having to get dressed (even though the dress code at the center is basically no-existent) and presentable every day made a difference in the way I felt about myself. I felt a renewed desire to lose weight and improve my image.

I think that a new position may give me the same sort of boost. I would have to dress up for work. No jeans and sweatshirts, no t-shirts, no polos.

I feel like I've been in cave too long. The past couple years have been hard for me. I haven't felt good about myself. I have felt embarassed about my body.

Even if I don't get offered the job, I need to make more of an effort to present myself in ways that make me feel attractive. I also need to do things that I know will make my body more attractive AND more healthy. When I'm moving in the right direction, I feel better. Just trying makes a world of difference!

BodyMedia FIT data for May 1, 2011
Calories Burned - 2553 | Calories Consumed - 2152 | Total Activity - 0:38 | Moderate Activity - 0:38 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 10110 | Sleep Duration - 5:42 | Lying Down - 7:31 | Sleep Efficiency - 76%.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Saturday's numbers were okay!

Calories Burned - 2968 | Calories Consumed - 2200 | Total Activity - 0:51 | Moderate Activity - 0:51 | Vigorous Activity - 0:00 | Steps Taken - 10840 | Sleep Duration - 7:12 | Lying Down - 11:31 | Sleep Efficiency - 63%..